6 Warning Signs You Are Unconsciously Comparing Yourself to Others
6个你无意识地把自己和别人比较的警告标志
Many of us are prone to compare ourselves to other people. Comparing yourself to others has its advantages and disadvantages. When you compare yourself to your friend or coworker once in a while, there’s nothing wrong with it, as such a comparison helps you become stronger, better and stay motivated to reach your goals. However, if you are constantly comparing yourself to others, it’s a red flag. From personal experience I can tell you that comparing will get you nowhere. You won’t live a better life and you won’t be happier. Comparing can ruin your life and you won’t even notice the reason why you are so miserable. Take a look at a list of the signs you are unconsciously comparing yourself to others and a few tips on how to stop it.
我们中的许多人很容易把自己和别人比较。把自己和别人比较有其优点和缺点。当你把自己偶尔比作你的朋友或同事,并没有什么错,这样比较可以帮助你变得更强大,更好的达到你的目标和保持动力。然而,如果你不断把自己和别人比较,这是一个危险信号。从个人经验我可以告诉你,比较会让你一事无成。你不会过上更好的生活,你不会快乐的。比较可以毁了你的生活,你甚至不会注意到你是如此痛苦的原因。看一下列表中你无意识地把自己和别人比较的迹象,有几条建议可以帮助你来阻止它。
1. You dwell on your past
你活在过去
If you compare yourself to a previous time in your life and you believe that your past was better than your present and your exes or friends are happier than you are now, it’s a sure sign you are unconsciously compare yourself to others. First, your past was not as better as you may think now, and there definitely were hard times and problems. Second, your ex or friend may not be as successful and happy as you think. Don’t believe in illusion and stop dwelling on your past. Focus on your present and enjoy new happy and bad moments in your life instead of past ones.
如果你比较自己以前在你的生活中的时间,你认为过去比你现在和你的前女友和朋友比你现在更快乐,这是一个你无意识地把自己和别人比较确定的信号。首先,你过去是不像你可能认为更好的现在,也绝对是困难和问题。第二,你的前任或朋友可能不像你想象的那么成功和快乐。不相信幻觉和停止活在在你的过去。专注于你现在和享受在你的生活中新的快乐和糟糕的时刻,而不是过去的。
2. You often judge others
你总是评判他人
The major problem of a modern society is that people become more selfish. We often judge others, we don’t respect people around us and think that we are better than they are. If you have a habit of judging other people, you should break it. It’s an obvious yet overlooked sign of comparison. You simply defend yourself and you are trying to boost your self-confidence by judging others. It’s a huge mistake!
现代社会的主要问题是,人们变得越来越自私。我们常常评判别人,我们不尊重周围的人,认为我们比他们更好。如果你有一个判断他人的习惯,你应该停止。这是一个明显的比较忽视的迹象。你只是保护你自己和你想提升你的自信通过评判别人。这是一个巨大的错误!
3. You project your anger onto others
你把你的愤怒发到别人身上
People who are constantly comparing themselves to others are unhappy. Unhappy people tend to project their feelings of anger onto people they respect and love. No, they don’t hurt them or make them unhappy. They just do it unconsciously. Start breaking your habit of comparing yourself to others with letting go of your anger.
不断地比较自己和别人的人不幸福。不幸福的人倾向于把他们愤怒发到他们尊敬和爱戴的人身上。不,他们不伤害他们或让他们不开心。他们只是无意识地做这件事。开始打破你把自己和别人比较的习惯,让你的愤怒离去。
4. You are constantly thinking about money
你总是想着钱
Are you satisfied with your financial situation? Do you want to make more money because your friend has a higher paycheck than you? You don’t notice those things you already have and you are not satisfied with your overall life. You think that your neighbors, friends, siblings and coworkers have a better life because they can afford to buy a new car, a new phone or expensive clothing. But, are you sure that they really can afford all those things? After all, they might have lots of debts and financial problems. Moreover, money will never make you happy, remember it.
你满意你的财务状况吗?你想赚更多的钱,因为你的朋友比你更高的薪水吗?你没有注意到对于这些事情你已经对你整体生活不满意。你认为你的邻居、朋友、兄弟姐妹和同事有一个更好的生活,因为他们能买得起一辆新车,一个新的电话或昂贵的衣服。但是,你确定他们真的买得起这些东西吗?毕竟,他们可能有大量的债务和财政问题。此外,金钱永远不会让你快乐,记住它。
5. You don’t love yourself
你不爱你自己
If you don’t love yourself, it’s one of the warning signs you’re unconsciously comparing yourself to others. Probably you often say something like ‘Your hair is more beautiful than mine’ or ‘You’re so slim and I’m so plump since I can’t drop those extra pounds.’ You should never ever say such things. Learn how to love your body, accept yourself and love yourself. You are special and you are absolutely beautiful no matter your age, weight and height. I don’t need to see you to write these words. I believe everyone is beautiful but in their own way. We all have flaws so no one is perfect.
如果你不爱自己,这是一个你无意识地把自己和别人比较的警告信号。可能你经常说“你的头发比我的更漂亮”或“你太苗条,我很胖,因为我没有减掉额外的几磅。你永远不应该说这样的话。学习如何爱你的身体,接受自己,爱自己。你是特别的,你是绝对美丽的无论你的年龄,体重和身高。我不需要看到你写这些话。我相信每个人都是美丽的在他们自己的方式。我们都有缺点,没有人是完美的。
6. You want to move out
你想搬出去住
If you want to move to another city because you can’t see and be happy for your friend’s success, coworker’s happiness or neighbor’s earnings, think twice. It’s not the reason to move out. First of all, learn how to love yourself. Once you accept yourself, you will give up on the idea to move to another city/country. If someone makes you unhappy, that’s one thing. But if you think that everyone makes you unhappy, that’s another thing. The same goes for your job. Don’t quit your job because of your coworker’s success. It’s not a smart thing to do.
如果你想搬到另一个城市,因为你不想看到你朋友的成功和快乐,同事的幸福或邻居的收益,三思而后行。这不是搬出去的理由。首先,学习如何爱自己。一旦你接受自己,你将放弃搬到另一个城市/国家的这一想法。如果有人让你不开心,这是一回事。但如果你认为每个人都让你不开心,那是另一回事。这同样适用于你的工作。不要因为你的同事的成功放弃你的工作。这不是一个明智的选择。
Many of us are trying to stop comparing ourselves to others, but at the same time many of us don’t even know that we have such a bad habit. Comparing breeds insecurity and makes us miserable. Remember, no one is perfect. Stay grateful, love yourself and enjoy your present life. Do you think comparing yourself to others is a bad habit?
我们中的许多人正试图阻止拿自己和别人比较,但同时我们中的很多人甚至不知道我们有这样一个坏习惯。比较产生不安全感,让我们苦不堪言。记住,没有人是完美的。保持感激,爱自己,享受你现在的生活。你认为把自己和别人比较是一个坏习惯吗?
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